Perfect Blue Buildings
by Lizzybug5
Summary: RyanSummer Something I thought of. Please RR.


"Perfect Blue Buildings"  
  
Author's Note: One parter. Once I discovered writing one parters, I found them to be so much easier. On that note, if any of y'all are reading my story "Hakuna Matata" I am still writing it, but I have lost some inspiration because I am not really a fan of Ryan/Marissa at this particular moment. Hope you like this story, and I got the title from a Counting Crows song. Also the writing in this story is really simple because I thought it fit. Please leave your feedback so I can improve my work!  
  
I glanced up at him, weary. I didn't feel like dealing with him tonight. He had probably talked to Seth and already had some opinion about me. Me telling him otherwise would make no difference.  
  
"I don't feel like having any company," I told him without looking up. I didn't want to give him the pleasure of seeing my red, puffy eyes. I had been crying ever since I left the Cohen house.  
  
"Sorry, you're just gonna have to deal with me," he told me as he sat down next to me.  
  
Taking a chance, I glanced at him. During these few seconds I spared to look at his face, I was surprised to see him offering me a half smile. It was rare to see a smile, even a half smile, plastered on his pretty face. I liked it.  
  
"You should smile more often," I said before remembering I didn't want him here. I wanted to be alone to wallow in self-pity. All I needed was a flask of whiskey to be my friend. "Leave," I added.  
  
He ignored me and took out a cigarette instead. "You mind?" he questioned.  
  
I shrugged. My parents didn't really care about cigarette smoke taking over their house. They were never here to care.  
  
He nodded and took his Zippo out. He lit a cigarette for himself and then handed me one. "The Cohens don't allow smoking so I figured it'd be the same here," he explained.  
  
"What? Like all us Newport brats are the same?" I asked him realizing that was what he meant. He put me in the same category as Seth...Seth who is an idiot and an asshole for turning me down. He choose some dork over me causing all of my work and sacrifices to be pointless. It feels horrible to be dumped, and for the first time in my life I feel pathetic.  
  
"Not true. Not everyone can be as snobby as you," he said in a matter-of- fact tone as he took a drag.  
  
I gave him the finger and shoved him. I picked the pillow up off the couch and threw it at him. He deserved it, and I felt powerful yet again. By hurting him, by having control over something, I was yet again the princess I let on I was. I regained my identity and was no longer vulnerable. I shoved him yet again, harder this time.  
  
He stood there staring at me. He didn't flinch, and he didn't push back. He didn't even try to stop me, and suddenly I paused. Was he really that used to be abused that he took it as if it was natural? Suddenly I cared about someone else, and I felt humane. Tears began to fall down my face because I felt remorse.  
  
"God, I am so sorry. I am so sorry. So sorry..." I mumbled as I fell into his embrace.  
  
He stood there hugging me, comforting me. For once I felt like someone else cared about me. I felt safe.  
  
"Shh, it's ok. It's ok," he whispered reassuringly as he led me to my bed.  
  
He laid down on my bed pulling me against him. Rubbing my back, he muttered words of reassurance. Minutes later, I realized what was happening and I pulled away horrified.  
  
"What the fuck was that?" I asked him standing and backing away from him. "Oh," I said horrified realizing I had makeup all over my face. I couldn't be seen in this state.  
  
I ran into the bathroom and began to throw up. This was too much. I couldn't deal with these types of emotions. I was used to pushing things to the back of my mind, occupying my time with shopping and boys and tans so I wouldn't think about the real stuff.  
  
He must have heard me puking because the next I think I knew, he was behind me holding my hair. After there was nothing left in my stomach, he wiped my mouth and carried me back to bad. We got back in bed, and as I began to drift to sleep, I wondered where his paternal instinct came from. Mere seconds from unconsciousness, I told myself I was going to ask him the next chance I got because I really did care. 


End file.
